How a Mind Works & the Unknown Variable

I

From a place behind here,
a brick wall suddenly clear
its quite simple
(yet I’m gesticulating)
you X
and so I Y
why why why
if X = my heartache
would you ever cross

the street,

your t’s

your eyes,
empty and wide

II

the man I knew
now
the unknown variable.

He Is More Gray

stupid memories
stupid dreams

the possibility path who
made me young

a prize
time is gone and

I still think I let you down
and

I still think I don’t
write like you thought I could

I think I failed you
and every Daddy after…